Yet another guest write – up by Archana, this time with her full consent, and no compulsion from my part. I felt it was straight out of her heart!
I was told I have lot of friends. There is a notion that the contact list in my cell exceed 500 by most to whom I speak to. When I started wondering why people have such confidence in me, it made me realize the value of a friend. Its then the shutters opened and the realization struck that it is not my friends who have me , it is that I have so many great souls around me with whom I got the opportunity to associate with. Even a second without them makes the day incomplete. The most famous Airtel ad that captivated every heart , especially the song “ Ovaru friendum theva machan” is the best example to depict the role of a friend in one’s life.
Who is a friend? The one who walks along with you all time? Or is he who takes part in both good and bad times? Or is he the one who acts as well wisher and protector? According to me “Friend is a combo of all three and much more “. You will find your friend standing beside you when you least expect and at the same leaving you alone when you expect his presence. Why does this happen? Why doesn’t he stand by all time? It is a quizzical query. Friends understand us more than what we know about ourselves. They know when it would be best time to make their presence, come on screen and act on our behalf. It is said when we are in dark times, we will get to know our true friend. But let me tell you something. The moment you feel comfortable with a person, that person becomes your friend. Close, best, cool, distanced friendship varies, let me not hit on that now. The point is each one has their own boundaries and strengths, within which they do their best to help and protect. Hence when someone doesn’t respond to your call during dark times doesn’t mean that they don’t care, it is either beyond their limits or they are not at the right place to lend their hand.
So then I have mentioned that each friend has their own boundaries in the previous paragraph, why does this boundary come into picture? Ah! So right time to hit on various types of friendship. Let me make it clear that I am not talking about strength, since it is a different concept. Depending on wavelength match we place friends in various zones. Close, best buddy would be the one who would come into close proximity of your wavelength 99%. 1% depends on the unique characteristic of a person, without which there will not be any distinguish happening. So it is with this buddy sharing of thoughts, personal life, and gossip on the daily activities come into picture and the feeling of belongingness is at its peak, that you would give yourself for your friend when he calls you. You would call yourselves as one individual. These buddies are known to complete each other’s sentence with ease. Then there comes good friend of mine. Here there is only 70 to 80 % match in wavelength. Though you would know he will be available for you, yet there is a catch on sharing personal life incidences. Sharing of worldly things will happen, there is an extension of help, but would lack the emotional side of belongingness. One would be grateful; there will be respect and love for one another as an individual, but not beyond that. Cool buddies are more of easy going characters and the bold ones who can face situations with ease. They also play a part when decisions are to be made and when jovial companionship is required. They have the aura to attract the crowd. They make the ambience bubbling, lively, and positive. Hence this is why these buddies are inevitable and one should be lucky to have one. These buddies keep our spirits high in general terms, but one might give a second thought to share their emotional side since they might not take it as seriously as one would wish it to be considered. Next comes the hi bye friends. These are people who we associate for the first time. Hence it takes time to place them in different categories. Some we wouldn’t prefer to even talk. Hmm why does this situation come? It is because we start judging the person before we actually try to get to know the person. Best advice I can suggest is to stop doing the same. First talk and then decide. None are so bad on this earth.
So then I have given my opinion regarding the different kind of friends, but let me point out that these kinds tend to overlap as well. So there is no definite boundary to any relationship, it all depends on the individual conception. One more thing I would like to quote is, be it any type of friendship, yet the flaw in a friend is ignored at most and only the best side of a friend is noticed first. The true value that we give to a friend can be understood only when we are alone. Value each and every friend and don’t loose them at any cost. Loosing a friend is like a boat without its ore down the stream of events called life.